I got botox today ! Ok don't freak out now! The reason is, my masseter (jaw muscle) has grown so much from teeth grinding over the past three years, that I couldn't stand it anymore. My face keeps looking big, despite me losing weight. Because muscle mass doesn't get affected by weight loss right. And since i keep chewing when i eat, the muscle mass won't go back. The photos show my face from it's most horrible angles: frontal and semi-profile with my mouth shut. My face looks fucking swollen and fat, I don't know. A mix of both maybe. I wouldn't be able to complain about this, if I didn't know that my face used to NOT look like this !!! Yes I used to have the V-line and now it's V-line gone bad. Look at this comparison photo:
Left: 18 / Right: 20 ! You see it right ? That the right side of my face has grown. And it's even bigger now. I have one more shit photos of myself of which I think that I look fat in them:
Ok so I had been doing research on this topic ever since I was 19. back then one of the guests at the restaurant I was working at, confirmed my suggestion that my face looked a little disformed. He said that it's probably 'masseter hypertrophy' and added that a lot of people in leading positions have it haha. I googled it right away and stumbled upon this procedure of botox injection to your jaw muscle so it get's smaller. Before that I always had the fear that I might have to get my jawline cut, like Korean people. A very disturbing and scary thought. I'm not sure whether I would have gone that far. But yeah then I read about this jaw botox thing and kept playing with the thought to get it done for the past two years. What made me get the courage to finally do it ? I met a girl who got it done and she said it helped a lot and that it wasn't painful or scary at all ! As easy as that. Suddenly it wasn't something someone got done in a youtube video. Suddenly it was real and easy, and the result was right there in front of my face. I had to get it done !!! But where ? I knew from research that a lot of people do it in Asia. Thailand, Taiwan, Singapore... But I didn't really get the opportunity to do it there, and didn't want to get it done in Vietnam either. It wasn't until Hai, my gay friend, told me that one of his friends got it done in Berlin and that his jawline has improved a lot ! So they do it in Germany as well !
And that's what the doctor confirmed to me today. That it's such a small procedure, that a lot of people get it done. Especially a lot of Thai women apparently. so I had my first appointment today, i came in, she asked me what my problem was, i said 'jaw muscle', and her reply was 'yes, masseter, I could tell right away!'. Great. Is my masseter THAT big ? Haha. In her eyes it looks very big compared to my small chin. She said she totally understands that I want to get it done. It will make my face a lot smaller after some procedures, if everything goes well. She then went on with the procedure right away. Two injections on each side, no pain, nothing. I still feel normal, my face still looks normal. There are side effects but the doctor told me that they are quite rare. So yeah, I got my two injections and it's going to take two weeks at least for the muscle to go back visibly and then after two to three months I will need another session. You know what she also said ? Full of excitement she admitted that she has never seen such a big and hard masseter. Great !!! Haha. Can't wait for it to go back. I will post after-photos as soon as something is visible and keep you updated about it. Don't say anything to tell me to stop doing it or anything. Just as i will not accept my belly fat, i will do what it takes to get rid of unnecessary jaw muscle mass (=masseter) as well ! Doctor also said that it might help with my headaches and teeth grinding. Let's see ! In the meantime, enjoy my big face as long as you still can haha. So glad I finally did this ! Paid 300€ btw.