Social Media Depression

I have 96.6K followers on my Instagram and probably the majority of them think that my life is amazing. But what many people don't know is that I know what it feels like to be on that side. Because just like anyone else I started at 0. When people now tell me that I have to act in a certain way because I'm 'famous', that's total bullshit to me. Because the increasing number on IG didn't really affect the way I live or the way I think. I appreciate it when people support me but my intention has never been to be famous or popular. I just have always been wanting to make myself proud in the first place. I wanted to create content and take photos that I like. I want to capture memories and want to be able to look back at them. That's what my Instagram was initially for. I never wanted to be an actress or a singer or just famous in any way. I'm a blogger, so it has always been about sharing experiences and life. Until now, when I do Youtube or anything, I just really want to share. I have been blogging for over ten years and my content has never been to push sales or for advertising. Of course every now and then I accept sponsoreships when it's really good money or I love the product (like Adidas Originals), but honestly speaking, I don't do a lot of advertising. My style is super niche market. My aesthetics is not relatable to the Vietnamese market and I have no intention of changing that. A couple times I did jobs and regretted them because I had to take and post weird photos and videos. But there's a first time for everything. I'm not the ideal girl for advertising because I'm so 'kho tinh' when it comes to visuals. I'm not dependant on this income so it's fine to me, I'll just keep doing what I like, and I hope one day people will be more appreciative of the effort I put into my Instagram aesthetics for example. Of course I could post some shit selfie with some colourful products but where would the credibility be ? That's not me and I wouldn't do myself or anyone a favour by doing that.

And just to let you know, I'm also influenced by social media a lot. Like sometimes I know it's paid advertisement when somebody gets a lot of presents for example, but even me can't help thinking wowww I want to have that too. I grew up with low self esteem and I have always looked at other peoples life on blogs and myspace back then, and that never helped with my depression. Looking at the great things other people have achieved and received just to fuel your inferiority complex is pointless. Remind yourself to work hard and it will pay off. Staying up till 4am stalking people's amazing lives on Instagram won't bring you anywhere. Yes I'm talking to you Julia ! : ))) As you can see, even 96.6K followers later, I'm still pretty much the same. I wish for myself and for all of you girls and boys who feel the same, that we will get out of this. And that we can just be content with our own life at some point you know. Ganbattteeeeeeee !