tendencies.

Well not really. But you know, iam Vietnamese, thus i belong to the category 'Asian'. Did you notice that all my favourite bloggers are Asian ? So are 70% of all human beings that I consider as beautiful or admirable. Unconsciously I have always been knowing it, but properly realizing i have not until I created that blog entry. Am I an Asian fanatic ? Or is it because I feel a stronger relation to Asian people because Iam Asian myself. It's a very odd question, which iam asking myself, that doesn't really have an answer. Iam not a racist, thinking Asians are better, prettier or smarter than other people. I just prefer looking at Asian people more than at other people. Why is that so. I don't even know myself. I was born and raised in Germany, never lacked German friends, didn't even really have Asian friends until I moved to Munich. But ever since I had internet and started reading manga, I have been incredibly fascinated by everything that comes from Asia. More than by any other culture. Everything that would come from Japan, China or whatever would raise my interest. For a very long time I used to be a otaku, reading manga all day and night. I was obsessed with manga, Japan and everything Japanese. I was into Cosplay, Visual Kei and all that kind of stuff, loved watching Korean drama over anything else. I only listened to K-pop, J-pop, Visual Kei and punk rock lol. Back then I was really obsessed, but I was thirteen as well lol. Maybe if I had never gotten in touch with that scene, I wouldn't feel such a deep connection with Asian cultures today. Maybe I would have never dealt with all those things Asian, and maybe I wouldn't give Asian things preference today. I don't think any of my other friends, who aren't as internet addicted as iam, feel that way. They might feel a deeper connection to the country their parents come from, but probably don't have that much of an interest in everything Asian as I do. 

Like when I see Caucasian people who are really cool I still think they are really cool. But not to the extend that I admire them that much. Or at least it doesn't happen as often as it happens with Asian people. Because I just don't relate to them that much. Like let's say I see a super cool Asian girl, and a super cool other girl. I'd totally admire the Asian girl thinking, oh why can't I be that cool. But with the other girl, I would only think, oh she's so cool. This is just an example, you know. There are many more situations in which i would feel similar. It's not like I do it on purpose. My brain simply does it. What can I do. I don't know if you get what I mean, because Iam really tired atm and know that my writing isn't very good, but if you do, what do you think could be the reason ? I can't grasp any further clear thought right now, iam really sleepy because didn't get much rest last night and did lash extensions for a girl today and went to work afterwards. That's like two times work on one day. Iam exhausted. All for the money. Money for nothing. 

EDIT. Ok due to an insulting comment iam taking this further. How is this being racist, if it simply is your natural preference, based on the roots of your interests in the past ? How about some Vietnamese friends I have, who never hang out with Asian people, don't know anything about Asian culture, are Asian, but think the same as me, but about white culture. Who don't find Asian culture and things that interesting. Or white people who are into black culture, and prefer and admire black people more. This is an issue based on your own interests and taste, not on racism. Would you call someone a racist who only dates white people, and says 'Omg no, i would never date an Asian or Black guy.' ? No you would not. It simply is her preference and you would leave it at that. Iam just saying that I prefer Asian, not that I prefer Asian and despise everything else. Which is absolutely not the case. I just feel like I don't relate to, let's say a Black person, as much as I do to an Asian person. Because iam Asian. And I think that is pretty natural. Of course in real life everyone is the same to me. I don't walk around thinking these thoughts. There is no real difference in how I treat people or how I like people. This is simply and observation I have made of myself, which I wanted to put down. And if you call this racism, do as your wish. Maybe you don't feel like this at all. Not everyone is the same.