Let's talk about.... well money. And life I guess. I got a really stupid message on Instagram today. Slimming it down to the core, she was basically telling me that I'm living a glitz and glamorous life, that's why I'm not capable of loving another person, because I love myself too much. Wait what ? First of all. I do not live a glamorous life here AT ALL. LIKE AT ALL. If you break it down in money, yes I do earn more here than I did in Germany, but below the line, I spend less than I did in Germany. I have always worked, starting at 13. Every vacation I would not go on vacation and visit my dad to work at his restaurant, even though my parents did give me a decent amount of pocket money. Because my thinking has always been, if I can earn more, why not. I have always hated the feeling of being broke or not being able to afford what I want. But I have never been wasteful with my money to the extend that I would buy luxurious things, just to be broke for two or three months. I like to have my savings account full and my wallet more empty. After my teenager phase and with my depressions, I started to spend a lot of money on alcohol. I love partying and clubbing. I loved having a great time with my friends and just dancing till the sun rose. When I'm having fun, it's worth my money. I shared with my friends and bought bottles at club by the time I was drinking legally. SO. Judging from my insta stories, yes I party a lot. Yes I buy vodka and champaign. Yes I eat out a lot because I love great food. Yes I put effort into making my home nice. Yes I spend money on aesthetically nice things. But not just now. The lifestyle I'm living now is exactly the same as when I was still in Germany. So what makes my life glamorous ? I really don't get it. Just because I live that kind of life in Vietnam, it makes me a spoilt brat who is not capable of loving others because I love myself so much that I allow myself to live my life that way ? Where's the sense in that ? I know I don't have to justify myself, because I worked hard for the life I'm living now. I know there are always going to be haters. But just breaking it down in money. What I spend in Vietnam on living and lifestyle costs is pretty much the same compared to what I'd spend in Germany. My rent here is even cheaper than in Germany, food is cheaper, I don't shop as much because there's barely anything to buy. Clubbing here is pretty much the same price as in Munich, and when I do go to fancy events, I don't even hire a hair and make up artist, but do my own make up. The only thing that is pretty heavy every month is transportation cost since I don't dare to ride the motorbike and have to take grab or uber. But most of the time I even prefer grabbike over grabcar. I don't like wasting money. So telling me that I live a glamorous lifestyle is really nothing but bullshit. I just try to live in a way that makes me happy, I like to be surrounded by pretty things, but that doesn't mean that it needs to be expensive or glamorous. Down to the core I'm still the kind of girl who'd prefer to sit on the street having a beer with good friends, rather than going to fancy events with champaign and talking to celebrities.
It kind of bothered me to read that, because I know that a lot of people in Germany think that I live such a luxurious lifestyle, but hey, come on. You eat out once or twice a week, too. You go clubbing every weekend as well. Maybe you even eat out every day, because buying a sandwich or doener kebab is also eating out already. It's not like I was super broke and poor in Germany before. I have always worked hard to earn money. I have always been living like this. Enjoying myself, going out, travelling, even when I did not earn as much as I do now. Just saying, you know.