Natural introvert - but that's ok.

Diary:

image.jpg

Yes sure, the people with the widest smiles and best social skills are always the most popular and the ones who know a lot of people. Extroverts. I always always always wanted to be one, but I have always been rather shy and reserved when meeting strangers. Because I lacked confidence and simply never know what to talk with people I'm not super close with. I don't feel comfortable around people I'm not close with, unless I'm drunk. I'd rather spend time alone at home rather than going to gatherings and hanging out with people I don't know very well. That's why I super rarely make close friends. Unless it's like love and getalong at first sight, I will avoid hangin out with people. Great. I used to hate myself for that. I never wanted to be an introvert, because society made me feel like I don't get acknowledged and respected unless I'm... loud and happy. The people with the best social skills and widest smiles have always gotten more advantages. I was really unsatisfied with myself throughout my whole life up to last year, because I knew I hated socializing, but I also felt like that's something that needs to be done. The lifechanging thing to me was a book called 'Quiet'. It talks about how being introvert is NOT a bad thing and that opened my eyes. It's ok not to be the most popular girl, it's ok not to be the prettiest, it's ok not to have the most friends, it's ok not to be the coolest, as long as you feel comfortable with your life. Of course you can want to change who you are, that's being ambitious and driven, and really damn fucking hard, so I respect people who make the change. What I'm trying to say is, you don't need to be an extrovert to lead a happy life. I only need the thought that my family and closest friends will always love me and be by my side when I need them, and the guy that I really love with all my heart, and I have never felt alone ever since. I have been really happy this past month even though I didn't go out, didn't got drunk and didn't interact with a lot of people. I have been happier than all the other months before in Vietnam. I just stay home and work and see Floralpunk blossom and selectedthings.vn growing and that makes me happy enough.